Guy in the Closet

From my recent episodes, I'm picking up the pieces to move on. While I'm on it, I'm writing down how I'm doing it, just in case they are helpful for anyone in the future.

DISCLAIMER: These are what I do for myself now. They may or may not apply well to you, so decide well on how you're going to deal with your breakup.

1. Make yourself let go of the relationship

   Reckon the fact that it's over. If you can't, do something that make you know it's over. Get clarifications from him, or his friends. Think over what happened and reason things out for yourself. You might end up thinking that he has a reason that he can't tell you for doing it, or that he can't stand some part of you. Whichever that you concluded, make sure you're able to give up on the relationship. The best one for me is still thinking that he can't stand some parts of me. That reminds me of what Marilyn Monroe said, "If you can't stand the worst part of me, you don't deserve the best part of me."

2. Cry

   Crying is a way to relief yourself. Do not think that a man must not cry like a woman. You can cry, be it alone or with your close friends. If you are like me, feeling embarrassed to cry in front of your friends, or have no close friends to cry to, then listen to melancholy songs or soppy series or movies, and cry on them. It feels better, even if you are not crying for the loss, but for the movies.

3. Do something meaningful

   Do not give up of your daily lives by living like a zombie. Just because you had a breakup doesn't mean your life is done. You still have to live, so live your life to the fullest. Do something meaningful. Do something that brings you value. E.g. go to a gym more often to shape up yourself, go for more sports events to exercise more, learn to swim or cook or dive or Photoshop or anything that you have always wanted to learn. Productivity is the key here. Make sure you gain something out of the things you do. Don't let the loss turning you haggard or obese or skinny or anyway you don't want to be.

4. Continue looking for the right guy

   Having yourself totally letting go of the relationship, you can move on the continue looking for the right guy. You may still think about him and that's okay because you have gotten used to having him in your life. But you know it's over and it's time to move on. Look for someone that deserve you more. Have outings. But when you have to decide whether to proceed into a relationship with the new guy, make sure you're completely off from your previous relationship.