Guy in the Closet

Weekend is finally here~!

I feel a bit of relieved for being able to take a little rest... but it's always too short =(

My senior ajak me to hang out tomorrow! Looking forward! This senior is really nice to me. He told me that he's worried that I will be bullied at work. Haha. Maybe he immediately thought that it doesn't sound right saying it that way - maybe he immediately regretted for saying so. Maybe it sounds stupid but I was really happy to hear it.

I have always wanted to be protected and be worried about. Maybe because my family has always put the least worry on me, as I have always been acting as if I have nothing for them to worry about. Stupidly contradicting.

Senior is someone that I have always looked up upon. We were in the same high school. He was three years more senior than me. But he was very famous in school. He was a high achiever in academics, and also a state level (if I remember correctly) athlete. He has won so many prizes and fame for the school and himself. I was a young little unknown junior to him and has always been looking up upon him. I wanted to be as famous and as great as him. He's like a role model to me, someone whom I wanted to be (anyway, I'm in no way close enough to his level).

I remember the first time I met him in company, I couldn't believe that I'm now working in the same company as him. My friend was introducing him to me, but before my friend told me his name, I already said it out. It almost feels like your idol is now your colleague, which is so unbelievably surprising and exciting. Senior and my friend were both surprised to hear me saying out the name.

He has told me that he wants to drag me out for long, because I stay at home too much. I know well that as much as I don't like crowded places, I won't mind to go out with him, because it feels good to have someone to care for me and I want to continue to be cared about.

Anyhow, senior has a gf. He's not gay. But I feel happy enough for having a big brother like him.

Crazy me.