A friend called up for a gathering, inviting all of my Chinese uni batch mates.
We were a really small group. There's only very few of us Chinese. But it doesn't break the norm of being divided into groups due to arguments.
I don't like this gathering. I don't even feel like going. I don't want to see the faces with fake smiles but are cursing one another on their minds. I don't want to see the faces of people who sabotaged me. I don't want to fake my smiles and pretend that I'm in good terms with them.
(Yes, I was sabotaged, too. Despite how I tried to be neutral and non-aligned I tried to be over the years, a group of trouble-makers seem to be so keen of sabotaging others, launched their sabotage on me with the most petty excuse of my slip of tongue during my final semester. It seems to me they just don't want anyone not in their group to be out of their sabotage.)
But at the same time, I don't want to appear I'm afraid of those who sabotaged me. I don't want to be seemed guilty due to my absence.
I haven't really decided to attend or not. Probably I'll talk to other who were sabotaged first.